5 Ways To Get Through The Doctor Who Drought

For the past few years, we've been used to having new Doctor Who around this sort of time. Not this year, though. So what are us poor starved Whovians to do...?

Top Five Faceless Villains

While we all enjoy a good villain to boo and hiss at (such as these fearsome females), sometimes it can be more interesting and unsettling to have a more unknowable - faceless - antagonist. In this list I won't be looking at baddies who hid their faces like The Claw from Inspector Gadget but those soulless villains, often corrupt corporations or surveillance states, who conspire against our hero for their own nefarious, and usually nebulous, ends. Evil organisations such as James Bond's SPECTRE aren't eligible as they often have a single leader (in SPECTRE's case, Blofeld) who acts as the hero's nemesis rather than the organisation themselves.

Wolfram & Hart

Appeared in: Angel 

Built around the premise 'what if lawyers actually were as evil as people say they are?, Wolfram & Hart are the demon-worshipping law firm that plan to end the world on Buffy spin-off Angel.
We get to know several of the firm's smarmy employees over Angel's five season run but we never meet the mysterious 'Senior Partners' - beings who are basically personifications of evil. An organisation of humans as the evil enemies of our traditional monster hero, W&H are the perfect villains for the more moraly-grey world of Angel. 

HYDRA

Appeared in: Marvel comics and the Marvel Cinematic Universe

Originally featuring in The First Avenger, HYDRA were used to a brilliant effect in The Winter Solider. In the Captain America sequel, that niggling doubt about the modern world - that we're all being spied on for evil purposes - turns out to be true and, what's more, the good guys we thought we could trust (namely SHIELD) are in fact controlled by HYDRA, the ex-Nazi terrorist organisation. HYDRA are one of the best faceless villains, as they have no one head person in charge. Quite literally as their catchphrase is 'cut off one head, two more will take its place.' Hail HYDRA!

The 'Listen' Creature

Appeared in: Doctor Who - 'Listen'

Number three on our list is a bit of a different one; rather than a headless organisation this one is an unseen creature. The most ambiguous Doctor Who monster, 'the perfect hider' that the Doctor hunts for in 'Listen' is left unseen, leaving it to the audience to make up for themselves whether such a creature exists. It's a sophisticated twist on the usually front-and-centre Who antagonists - but, come on, that is clearly an alien standing behind Clara...

The Village

Appeared in: The Prisoner

Probably the most nebulous of the villains on this list, we never get any real sense of what the mysterious overseers of the Village in 60s spy series The Prisoner actually want. We know they wish to find out why our nameless hero Number Six resigned from his job but just why it is so important we never find out. Regardless, the ever-changing figure of Number Two, who runs the Village, the unique architecture and the almost-lobotomised residents make the Village one of the most insidious faceless villains in all of fiction. But, as Number Six always asks, who is Number One?

Big Brother

Appeared in: Nineteen Eighty Four 

Turning our list on its head is our leader. All Big Brother is is a face - whether he exists or not is never discovered but the image of Big Brother is certainly used by corrupt dictators IngSoc to keep control of the dystopian Britain featured in Orwell's seminal novel. Created in the forties, Big Brother infamously predicts the rise of the surveillance state. If you need proof that Big Brother is the most evil faceless villain on this list it inspired the inexplicably long-lasting Big Brother reality series. It may appear that we are the ones who are watching Big Brother but, in fact, Big Brother is watching you...

Top Five Immortal Characters

Immortality has always been a popular trope in all forms of fiction, as it's a perenially fascinating topic. As such there are many great fictional characters who never shuffled off this mortal coil - and here are some of my favourites. 
To keep things interesting I've banned myself from putting any Doctor Who characters on this list (really, I could fill the whole lot up with Who folks - The Doctor, Captain Jack, the Master, the Cybermen...). So read on for a who's-who-and-also-not-in-Who of immortal characters. Hurry up, before we all die of old age...  

 Vampires

Fiction is full of vampires tortured by their immortality, so I've bundled them all into one for the sake of variety (and to represent them I've chosen one of the world's more underappreciated vampires; the Count from Sesame Street. Not enough evil undead give their eternal lives to teach young children arithmatic). They come in different groups. Many like to spend eternity causing bloodshed - Dracula. Some like to spend it righting wrongs - Genevieve Dieudonne who fights the aforementioned Prince of Darkness in Anno Dracula. And others like to switch between both - such as TV vampires Hal York and Spike. Whatever the type, though, you can rely on a vampire to spark an interesting discussion on the nature of immortality. 

The Hempstock Women

The Ocean at the End of the Lane is really the story of two ancient forces battling each other with a small ordinary boy caught in the middle. While the terrifying Ursula is vehemently on the side of the bad, the Hempstock women serve as the boy's saviours and prove that immortality doesn't have to make you tortured - it can just make you wise. The three Hempstocks (almost personifying the stereotypical three witches) and the nature of their long shelflife is well dealt with; we know they were around at the time of the Domesday Book and beyond but we never really find out who or what they are. The Hempstocks tell us that, yes, we don't understand all the mysteries of the universe but sometimes it's better not to. 

 Peter Pan 

It is an oft-discussed notion if one would choose immortality. Certainly, most of the characters on this list would call it a curse. But Peter Pan, the Boy Who Never Grew Up, chooses to be immortal rather than face the terrors of adulthood. At first, just as Peter does, many of us would love to be carefree children forever but there's tragedy in Peter's decision, as ably presented in the surprisingly good 2003 film and messed about with in Steven Spielberg's Hook, as he cannot do such grown-up things as reciprocate his feelings for Wendy. Ultimately, though, it's up to you whether Peter's life is a blessing or a curse, making him one of the most interesting immortal characters around. 

Edward Scissorhands

I was going to put Frankenstein's monster on this list but then remembered that immortality is not really an attribute of Mary Shelley's original creation, more of the films that it spawned. So instead Frankie's gothic cousin Eddie takes his spot on this list. A cross between the monster, the Beast and Tim Burton himself, Edward is an innocent who, just like the monster, is corrupted by the outside world. Unlike Frankie, he's also one half of a doomed romance, partly made impossible by his immortality. Edward serves as a warning that it's no fun to be different. 

Tithonus 

 While others on this list might not have enjoyed their immortality, they at least had the comfort of being frozen in time, never ageing. Unfortunately, Tithonus, one of the unluckiest figures in Greek Mythology, learnt the hard way that your should always check the fine print when wishing for eternal life. After falling in love with this lowly mortal, the goddess Aurora pleaded with Zeus to make him immortal - unfortunately, she forgot to ask for everlasting youth. Thus, Tithonus grows into a withered husk of a man - who his immortal lover eventually grows tired of. Tithonus is the epitome of all immortal fictional characters as he embodies the idea at the heart of all of them; we might all wish for longer lives but you have to be careful what you wish for. 

Top Five Fictional Female Villains

Last week, there was a shocking reveal at the end of the penultimate episode of this year's run of Doctor Who. It turned out that - oh, it's been a whole week now, I can say it - the mad Marry Poppins-esque Missy who has been terrorising the Doctor is in fact... the Master!
So to coincide with the return of the Doctor's greatest adversary in a very different form, I thought it time to look at the most despicable women from the halls of fiction, an illustrious category that the Master now belongs to. In no particular order, I give you the most terrible, terrifying and iconic female villains.

Morgan Le Fay
Appeared in: The legends of King Arthur

I'm something of an enthusiast of the legend of King Arthur. I don't claim to be an out-and-out expert but I appreciate the tales as something like the founding fathers of British storytelling and always enjoy dipping into the wealth of interpretations of the stories (although I was never that fussed about the popular BBC series Merlin, oddly enough). The legends, of course, have brave heroes in King Arthur and Merlin but also have a great villain in Arthur's half-sister, Morgan Le Fey (sometimes called Morgana) who acts as the main antagonist in most modern versions. Lusting after the throne of Camelot, Morgana will stop at nothing to end Arthur's reign, including using her own son, Mordred, to kill his uncle (and sometimes father) in battle. She's been hounding King Arthur in various forms over roughly a thousand years - you don't get much more of a determined villain than that.

Irene Adler
Appeared in: 'A Scandal in Bohemia' by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle and numerous film and TV adaptations and literary pastiches.

Technically, Conan Doyle's original character from the Sherlock Holmes canon was not a true villain - Holmes was against her in the case but her only crime is a dalliance with a European royal in her youth. In most adaptations, however, her character is extrapolated to become a proper criminal. Much like Catwoman is to Batman, she and Holmes tend to work on opposite sides of the law but nevertheless harbour an affection for each other, sometimes this is unspoken, sometimes it is a fully-fledged love affair. This version of the character has been explored recently in both Sherlock and the Robert Downey Jr films but in Elementary, the character was taken further. The presumed dead ex-love of Sherlock, Irene turned out to be a female Moriarty in disguise. Changing a male master criminal into a woman - I'm sorry, Moffat, I think someone beat you to the punch.

The Other Mother
Appeared in: Coraline by Neil Gaiman.

Neil Gaiman's Other Mother from his exquisitely creepy children's novel Coraline is less of a villain in the femme fatale mould of Morgana and Irene and more of a walking nightmare. A creature from a realm of her own devising, like a spider in its web, the Other Mother lures children into her lair to feast on their souls. To entice the children, rather than use a house made of sweets, she acts as a loving parent... just one with buttons for eyes. The Other Mother is an utterly terrifying creation, playing off the inherent childhood fear of adults you trust to look after you turning out to do the opposite. As well as the simply intrinsically scary image of people with buttons for eyes. something which resides firmly in the uncanny valley.

Miss Havisham
Appeared in: Great Expectations by Charles Dickens

As a creation of Dickens, the claim that Miss Havisham is a cast-iron villain is a less clear one than with others on this list. The woman has a sympathetic backstory and eventually repents her wickedness, but she is still the greatest thorn in Pip's side as he tries to woo the love of his life, the icy Estella. Having been jilted at the altar, the ageing bride-to-never-be forever wears her ragged wedding dress and plans to use her adopted daughter, Estella, to break the hearts of men everywhere like her's was broken. Miss Havisham is someone whose own debilitating heartbreak and thirst for revenge has blinded her to how her actions affect others. Firstly, not only does she torment Pip merely to wallow in his pain but, more importantly, she raised Estella to be nothing more than her foot soldier, to go and act out her wish to destroy all men for her. 'Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned', indeed.

Dolores Umbridge 
Appeared in: the Harry Potter novels by JK Rowling and its film series, played by Imelda Staunton

The most despicable character in the Harry Potter series. Yes, Voldemort killed Harry's parents. Yes, Bellatrix Lestrange killed Sirius Black but neither of them wore such an alarming shade of pink.
Outwardly twee, Professor Umbridge harbours a deep lust for power and a sadistic streak as great as the Dark Lord's own, shown in the gruesome punishments she dishes out in detention and her placement at the head of the Ministry of Magic's witch-hunt (sorry, muggle-hunt). From her prissy, condescending nature to her more despotic tendencies, Umbridge is unlikeable to the core. In fact, Umbridge is so repulsive you can hardly stand to look at her photograph. That's why I've put her last, so you don't have to look at her for too long. And that's the truth because, as Umbridge herself likes to brand people with, I must not tell lies...


'Death in Heaven', the Doctor Who finale, is on tonight at 8.00 pm on BBC One.

Top Five Batman Graphic Novels

As our, ulp, very special guest established earlier, for one month only Scribbles Creatures is... Comic Creatures! To start our series of posts on everything comic, we're turning to that courageous Caped Crusader, that determined Dark Knight, that reliable Roving Rodent (that's not right, is it?), the Batman. While not as encompassing as my love for those other long-lasting heroes, the Doctor and Sherlock Holmes, I've been a Batman fan since watching repeats of the gloriously-camp 1960s television series as a kid. Though I'm much more familiar with on-screen exploits, I've also read a fair few Batman comics over the years and the following five are those I like to keep handy in my utility belt. Just in case I get a chance for a spot of reading while crusading at night.

 Batman: Gothic

While not as well-known as the others on this list, this early comic from modern-day Batman writer Grant Morrison was one of the first Batman graphic novels I read - and it's rather stuck with me. The story starts with Gotham's mobsters being picked off by a mysterious stranger called Mr Whisper. As Batman investigates, he finds out this Mr Whisper, a man without a shadow, may be something more peculiar than the Penguin, more curious than Catwoman, something altogether more... gothic.
With allusions to the Faust legends and Matthew Lewis' classic novel, The Monk, this is a graphic novel that stands out for the strength of its literary illusions, taking the Bat from his usual superhero habitat and putting the Goth firmly back in Gotham.

Batman: Whatever Happened to the Caped Crusader?

Batman is dead and every one of his friends and foes has gathered in Crime Alley for his wake. And so has Batman. With a ghostly guide for company, Batman watches as various stories are given as to how he died. But which is the real one? Or is he even dead?
As strange and as lyrical as anything Neil Gaiman writes, this was intended to be a bookend for all the different versions of the Batman across the ages. Rather than pitting the Bat against a scheming villain, this sees Batman face up to his own subconscious, or maybe its something else. As a touching testament to the endurance of the World's Greatest Detective, WHTTCC? cannot be beaten. Much like the Dark Knight himself.

 Batman: The Killing Joke

The Joker is far and wide the greatest comic book villain, a raging lunatic who's popularity has sustained as long as the Batman's own. As you would expect for such a popular character, he's featured in dozens of strips over the years but Alan Moore's The Killing Joke is certainly the definitive Joker story.
Detailing the two-sides-of-the-same-coin nature of Batman and his arch-enemy like never before, Killing Joke gives us a potential origin for the clown (but even the man himself isn't sure if its real), his most despicable crime (poor Barbara Gordon...) and the only time he's ever made Batman laugh (what does that ending mean?). An influence on both Nicholson's and Ledger's portrayals of the character, this is a deeply psychological, often grisly, look at what makes the usually-unfathomable Joker tick.


Batman: The Long Halloween

The Long Halloween is most probably my favourite story in a Batman comic. A proper whodunnit, it spans a year-long investigation of the serial killer known as 'Holiday' by the triumvirate of Batman, Commissioner Gordon and District Attorney Harvey Dent. As that name may have suggested, aside from an engaging mystery featuring appearances from all your favourite Bat-villains, TLH also details the fall of Harvey Dent and his transformation into Two-Face, one of the most interesting of Batman's rogues gallery. An expert blend of classic Hollywood film noirs and traditional Batman detective work, this is actually a sequel of sorts to another Batman storyline. I wonder which one...?

 Batman: Year One

While it may be sacrilegious not to include Frank Miller's seminal graphic novel The Dark Knight Returns in a 'Best Batman stories' list... it's what I've gone and done! As previously stated, while TDKR is undoubtedly an impressive piece of work, an ultra-violent, tank-driving version of the Caped Crusader is just not my preferred idea of the character. Conversely, the quality of Miller's follow-up Batman: Year One, which details how the Batman came to be, is much harder to argue with. In a Gotham corrupt to its core, Year One follows its two true heroes, the fledgling Batman and rising cop James Gordon, as they attempt to clear up their beloved city, eventually coming together in an alliance. Year One is a perfect summation of what makes Batman so enticing a character; due to his terrible past, Bruce Wayne gives his life to guarding over the people of Gotham City. It's not just an act of pure vengeance but a dedication to a bigger purpose. Unlike many of his comic counterparts, Batman shows you don't need to be super to be a hero.

Top Five Fictional Sidekicks

To tie in to my upcoming mini-blogathon concerning favourite fictional characters, I thought I would follow on from my previous post, Top Five Fictional Characters With No Name, with a list of the best sidekicks from fiction. A hero is nothing without a loyal trusty sidekick who will never leave their side - as I, a humble blogger, am nothing without readers. So do read on and discover a few of the most loyal and trustiest sidekicks of them all.


Baldrick
Appeared in: the Blackadder series, played by Tony Robinson

It's a staple of comedy that the main character will have a bumbling idiotic sidekick and the fiendish Edmund Blackadder's servant through the ages, Baldrick, is the epitome of the stereotype. As with the best double acts, Baldrick is a perfect foil for his wily master; with a brain not big enough to be spread over a small water biscuit, he often tries to aid Blackadder in his schemes with a 'cunning plan' that always fails to live up to the promise. On a side note, if you're not familiar with the Blackadder series it's the Shakespeare of television comedy and is a clever as a fox that's been made professor of clever at Oxford University.


Ron and Hermione
Appeared in: the Harry Potter books by JK Rowling and film series, played by Rupert Grint and Emma Watson

We're all familiar with these two. That boy wizard in the glasses would surely have never made it through all the magical mayhem if it were not for his infallible friends. Both are likeable characters; while Hermione is the intelligent one, Ron is generally seen as the comedy sidekick thanks to the character's presentation in the films (though Rupert Grint does a great job, particularly in The Deathly Hallows: Part One) but he is more fleshed-out in the books. As with everything in Rowling's stories, Ron and Hermione come from familiar moulds but the moulds work well, hence why they are moulds in the first place. Moulds.

Nick Carraway
Appeared in: The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald

When thinking of classic sidekicks one's mind doesn't necessarily jump to the narrator of F Scott Fitzgerald's The Great Gatsby. However, I'm fond of Carraway (not neccesarily Tobey Macguire's film version, although I didn't dislike him as others did) and find his friendship with Gatsby rather Holmesian/Watsonian. Like many other classic sidekicks, we see the hero of the story through Nick's eyes; while Gatsby is the star of the novel, Carraway, his closest friend, is an equally well-fleshed out character who contrasts and compliments the protagonist. Definitely a sidekick. A great sidekick.

Sarah Jane Smith

Appeared in: Doctor Who, the Sarah Jane Adventures and K-9 and Company, played by Elisabeth Sladen

In its illustrious fifty-year history, Doctor Who has featured many beloved sidekicks, or companions as we fans call them, for everyone's favourite eccentrically-dressed, Sonic Screwdriver-using alien. But of them all, Elisabeth Sladen's Sarah Jane Smith is the most treasured; a character that every companion created since is measured up to. An intelligent, adventurous journalist, Sarah was the star of her own popular spin-off show (that was only cancelled upon the event of Sladen's untimely passing) and, like the Brigadier, has worked with multiple Doctors. Sarah Jane is simply the Doctor's greatest friend.


Dr Watson
Appeared in: the Sherlock Holmes stories by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle and numerous film and TV adaptations and literary pastiches

In a list of the greatest fictional sidekicks, who else could take the top spot over Baker Street's finest doctor, chronicler and moustache-spotter, Sherlock Holmes' right-hand man, Dr John (sometimes James, but let's not get into that now) Watson? He is everything the hero's best friend should be; an everyman to contrast with the hero's extraordinary nature but also with a streak of brilliance to be of aid to the hero. Together with Holmes he is known for being one half of the greatest friendship in literature but even by himself Dr Watson is one of the most popular and enduring characters fiction has ever produced.

Top Five Fictional Characters With No Name

After fifty years of mystery, it has been promised that this Saturday in the current series finale of Doctor Who, the Doctor's name will be revealed in the aptly-titled 'The Name of the Doctor.' To celebrate the occasion I thought I would draw up a list of other fictional characters that remain nameless (one of whom the Doctor may cease to be come Saturday). It's not so much a definitive list than a few characters from disparate strands of fiction that, I think, use their namelessness effectively. So, please, read on, whatever your name is.


Nobody Owens
Appeared in: The Graveyard Book by Neil Gaiman

The protagonist of Neil Gaiman's excellent young adult novel The Graveyard Book, Nobody Owens, known as 'Bod', was made an orphan as a baby after a mysterious killer murdered his family. Instead, Bod was raised, naturally, by the resident ghosts of a graveyard he called home, with the novel following his adventures in and out of the cemetery. Technically, Bod may not count for this list as he is given a name by his surrogate spook-relatives but Nobody is only called such as his adopted mother says 'he looks like nobody but himself.' That's hardly a name now, is it?


 Captain Jack Harkness
Appeared in: Doctor Who and Torchwood, played by John Barrowman

If you only know of John Barrowman's flighty adventurer Captain Jack from Doctor Who, you may be a bit surprised by his placement on this list due to the fact that, well, he has a name. However, in his own spin-off series Torchwood, it is revealed that Jack stole the identity of the real Captain Jack Harkness, an American WW2 soldier, back in the days when he was a bad'un. It's a clear attempt to make Jack more like the Doctor and perhaps isn't mined to too large a degree but it does add to the character's enigmatic and very long life (he's immortal, remember).

The Joker
Appeared in: Batman comics and numerous film and TV adaptations

I'm sure you're all familiar with this fellow. Mad as a box of frogs, the Joker is Batman's arch-nemesis. Sometimes a fairly harmless trickster others a psychotic killer, whatever version of the character it is his past is reliably convoluted and unknowable. Apart from in Tim Burton's Batman where Jack Nicholson's Clown Prince of Crime is called, um, Jack, and in Alan Moore's The Killing Joke graphic novel, where his name is ... also Jack. Well, apart from those examples, the Joker is made all the more threatening due to his namelessness as the less we know of his origins and motives, the more we wonder. Which is far more potent; a large reason why he is such an effective and popular character.


Number Six
Appeared in: The Prisoner, played by Patrick MacGoohan

In the superb sixties series, The Prisoner, a man resigns from his (unknown) job returns to his London flat where he is gassed and wakes up in the Village. A surreal, remote town full of brainwashed individuals and run by the face-changing Number Two, he seems to have been brought there so 'they' may find out the reason why indeed he resigned. As each inhabitant of the Village is assigned a number, we never find out our protagonist's name as he, each episode, tries to escape the Village. The importance of Number Six's lack of a name and his constant refusal to back down to the powers behind the Village is summed up in his famous phrase: 'I am not a number, I am a free man!' The series itself I highly recommend; it's truly iconic and has influenced such modern successful series such as Lost and Life on Mars.


The Creature
Appeared in: Frankenstein by Mary Shelley and numerous film, TV, literature and theatre adaptations

The greatest nameless character from all of fiction surely has to be Mary Shelley's sorrowful, passionate and volatile creation. We're all familiar with his story: the outcome of an experiment to create life by Victor Frankenstein, the Creature is shunned by his 'father' and forced to fend for himself upon which he learns humanity's best and worst qualities. Played by Benedict Cumberbatch, pictured left, who shared the role with Johnny Lee Miller in the fantastic Danny Boyle stage production, the Creature is defined by his lack of identity; constantly searching for his place in the world rather than being the inhuman monster that the people he encounters take him for. The Creature's story perfectly encapsulates why our names and identity, things we take for granted, are so important to how the world perceives us and how we view ourselves.


Talking of fictional characters.... Before we get too philosophical, this post acts as a forebear for an upcoming small blogathon I'm hosting concerning our Favourite Fictional Characters. If this interests you, have a read about it here.

A Blog Post for Burton

With his new stop-motion animated film, Frankenweenie, released in the UK this week, I thought it about time I dedicated a blog to my favourite director, the estimable Mr Burton. The creator of the man with the scissorhands, that skeleton who sings a lot and the Batman movie franchise. Yes, that's right. Bow down to him.

I'm not quite sure how I first encountered Burton's work but I know I found his films not just entertaining but fascinating as a child. And also pretty scary; his horror film Sleepy Hollow - which I probably shouldn't have been watching at a young age - certainly made an impression on under-10 me. I imagine it was his singular style, making the macabre and the grotesque lovable which interested me. I'm not the biggest fan of films (I do like films though, don't get me wrong) but I've always connected with Burton's work and can still say - and I think I'm in a minority here - that I haven't seen a film that he's directed I don't like. Yes, some are certainly better than others and some I only like while others I really like but all of them are good, original, entertaining films. Mainly because they are directed by Tim Burton.

In case you're not familiar with his films but would like to give them a go (and as you can probably tell, I would recommend it) here's my top five films directed by him (so there's no Tim Burton's The Nightmare Before Christmas - ironically not actually directed by the man). So why not book yourself a holiday in a gothic castle or haunted town and take some of these films for company... And watch out for those things lurking in the night. Though they may well just be misunderstood.


Edward Scissorhands

Seen by many as Burton's masterpiece, Scissorhands sees the innocent, abandoned creation of a mad inventor, Edward, a man with - well, you know that part - taken from his castle home to a bright, sunny town where he unwittingly causes a stir among the neighbourhood. Its a wonderful expressionistic film upon which every following Burton film is judged next to. Johnny Depp is superb while Winona Ryder also performs exceedingly well alongside him. Engrossing, funny and tear-jerking.


Batman Returns

While Burton's first Batman film is still fun, its sequel, Returns, is an improvement even though/because its one of the director's darkest offerings. Not the superhero blockbuster many were expecting, its largely a film about a strange batch of severely oddball, psychologically-interesting characters, particularly its villains with De Vito's Penguin, Pfieffer's Catwoman and Walken's Shreck chewing up most of the screen time away from its star. It doesn't have much of a plot but its still great to see the Batman world through a Tim Burton kaleidoscope.


Ed Wood

While not exactly a box office hit, this is probably Burton's most critically lauded film - and deservedly so. Its a biopic telling the tale of 1950s sci-fi/horror director Ed Wood (Johnny Depp - who else?), known by many as the Worst Director of All Time. Filmed in black-and-white (a trick Burton is using again for Frankenweenie) it properly captures the feel of the sort of movies the real Wood made and avoids the obvious route of making fun of Wood. Instead it views him as an optimistic individual with dreams bigger than his talent could match.


Sleepy Hollow

A rare proper horror film from Burton, Sleepy Hollow is a lavish production that looks great as well as being a genuinely well-told story. Based on the classic spooky tale by Washington Irving, lateral-thinking detective Icabod Crane is called to the creepy New England town of Sleepy Hollow to investigate tales of the fabled Headless Horseman - and has his beliefs tested to the limit. Part-horror, part-whodunnit supported by a fantastic cast, this remains one of Burton's most entertaining films.


Corpse Bride

Truth be told, even if I could include Nightmare on this list, Corpse Bride would still get the place. Although I'm extremely fond of its counterpart, I prefer Corpse's style and think Burton's experience shows in the film's confidence. It also possesses a stronger story; Victor Everglott has been forced into an arranged marriage, terribly nervous about his upcoming wedding he practises his vows in a forest only to accidentally wed Emily, the corpse bride, and becomes embroiled in the ironically lively world of the dead. At the moment, it's my favourite of Burton's stop-motion films but I'm hoping Frankenweenie will give it a run for its money.



In other news: I write for WhatCulture! now Whatculture! is cool.

If you're interested, please read my first article for the good people at Whatculture! titled '7 Doctor Who Monsters Who Most People Forget.' Go check the site now to see which of the show's array of beastly baddies made it on to the list. Oh, and watch that space for future articles. See you there.

Matt Smith's Best Doctor Who Episodes

As the new series of Doctor Who starring Matt Smith, Karen Gillan and Arthur Darvill starts TOMORROW (!) I thought I would celebrate the occasion by having a quick run-through of the trio's five best episodes so far.


A Christmas Carol

By a way, my favourite Who Christmas Special ever. Moffat utilises his liking for signature a timey-wimey plot but imbues this one (based wholeheartedly on Dicken's classic story) with an extra warm glow and emotional heart that is sometimes sidelined by his complex storytelling. Michael Gambon is, of course, excellent as the Scrooge-like Kazran Sardick and Smith again proves he knows he's own role intimately.

The Time of Angels/ Flesh and Stone

This really is a cracking Doctor Who Two-parter. Not only does it feature the perennially scary Weeping Angels, it sees the return of River Song, her first reappearance at the time. There's some fab ideas (the Angel in Amy's eye, the time cracks, the great reveal about the statues) and its full of action but action centred on the characters - the very best kind.

The Girl Who Waited

This is an episode that really doesn't get praised enough. Yes, its 'low-budget' episode of last year but, seriously, who cares? Doctor Who has a long tradition of putting the strength of its writing and acting before everything else and this episode demonstrates that better then any other. Also, it's completely focused on the superb  Karen Gillan and Arthur Darvill as Amy and Rory which is always a good thing.

The Doctor's Wife

The writer of this episode, Neil Gaiman, is my favourite author so I was always going to love it. To me, its so good because it takes perhaps the most familiar thing in Doctor Who and shows it in a completely new light; namely, making the TARDIS a woman. It's quirky, funny and at the end, almost heartbreaking. Also, Gaiman uses continuity references not in a solely-for-the-fans sort of way but so that it feels spectacular that the show has such a long history. Magic.

 A Good Man Goes to War

TGMGTW really has everything a finale should have. The stakes are raised to the highest for all involved and the thrills never stop. However, it not only works in an adrenalin-pumping sense but is stuffed full of memorable supporting characters (Silurian Madame Vastra, Sontaran Nurse Strax, Cowardly Dorium ETC) and is an excellent culmination of the themes running through the past six years of Doctor Who: the juxtaposition of the Doctor as an eccentric bumbler and also a great warrior. Technically, this is a two-parter with Let's Kill Hitler but I haven't included that here as, although it has the best title EVER, I don't think it quite lives up to 'Good Man''s heights.


So that's your lot. It was a incredibly hard task whittling the list down to these five as the Smith/Moffat Era is full of amazing episodes. I love the Smith/Moffat Era; the Smith/Moffat era is cool! The genius 'The God Complex', the surreal 'Amy's Choice' and the two hilarious episodes starring James Corden all came very close but those above just pipped them. The fact that I've not numbered them shows how difficult it was to sort out these five. However, what little I know of the five episodes to come (being a fan who dislikes spoilers) suggests that I may have to seriously rethink this list in the near-future.

On a final note, remember to watch Steven Moffat's Asylum of the Daleks on BBC One 7.20. OR. YOU. WILL. BE. EXTER-MINATED!

Sherlock Holmes Stories You Have to Read

I talk a fair bit about the BBC modernised series of Sherlock (which is understandable as it is brilliant) but I'm not sure I spend enough time on the original stories themselves; without which Sherlock wouldn't be here *cue dramatic look at some scenery*.
So to counteract that, I'm dedicating a blog post to the top five Sherlock Holmes stories that anyone trying to get into the Sherlock Holmes Canon should read. It was a tough choice as Arthur Conan Doyle composed many classics, which I haven't included in this list. Joys such as the ingenious mystery of The Dancing Men, the confounding tale of the Red-Headed League and Holmes' first ever published adventure A Study in Scarlet lost their places to these following greats of the detective genre. These five stories perfectly capture the great strengths of the Holmes stories which have ensured their longevity; the intelligent plots, the dastardly villains and, most importantly, the friendship of Holmes and Watson. Now, read onward. The game's afoot!

A Scandal in Bohemia

Published in: The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes
Story: The King of Bohemia himself calls upon the Great Detective to retrieve a compromising photograph from the beautiful - but dangerous - Irene Adler. Holmes thinks the job will be easy but has he actually met his match?
Why is it good?: Largely, because it's the only story to feature Irene Adler - the one woman the usually-cold Holmes shows anything akin to emotion for and one of the few people to actually beat him. It's a fascinating read that shines a light on the man underneath the cold mask.
Quote: 'To Sherlock Holmes she is always the woman.'

The Speckled Band

Published in: The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes
Story: Holmes and Watson investigate a case involving a locked-room murder,cryptic cries and exotic animals. Culminating in an encounter with a deadly snake, the duo might themselves fall to the mysterious Speckled Band...
Why is it good?: Quite probably the most well-written Holmes story. Conan Doyle throws everything into it and it works brilliantly. It's Sherlock Holmes' most rousing adventure!
Quote: "When a doctor does go wrong, he is the first of criminals. He has the nerve and he has the knowledge."

The Final Problem

Published in: The Memoirs of Sherlock Holmes
Story: Sherlock Holmes is determined to defeat 'Napoleon of Crime', Professor Moriarty, whatever the cost. The two rivals lock in a battle of wits spanning the entire continent before meeting on the cliffs of the Reichenbach Falls. They both know there is only one way it can end...
Why is it so good?: When Conan Doyle decided to kill Holmes off he obviously went all out to make the story as climactic as possible. Not only do we get Holmes and Watson adventuring further than ever before, Holmes gets a truly memorable nemesis - a character who every super villain over the next hundred years would be drawn from.
Quote: '' I shall ever regard (Holmes) as the best and the wisest man whom I have ever known.''

The Hound of the Baskervilles

Published as: The Hound of the Baskervilles
Story: An ancient family curse is once again plaguing the Baskervilles of Dartmoor; A black demon dog is running amok through the moors! With Holmes apparently busy in London, Dr Watson finds his world turned upside down by the supernatural...
Why is it so good?: By far the best of Conan Doyle's Holmes novels, it rightly deserves its success as the most famous Sherlock Holmes adventure. The mystery is well plotted (without the long annoying flashbacks of other novels) and comes to an exciting finale on the moors. Set before Holmes' death but published afterwards, its success led to Holmes' eventual resurrection...
Quote: 'Mr Holmes, they were the footprints of a gigantic hound!'

The Empty House

Published in: The Return of Sherlock Holmes
Story: Dr Watson is shocked to find his best friend, Sherlock Holmes, did not die at the Reichenbach Falls but instead faked his death. Soon, they are off investigating once more; this time on the trail of Colonel Moran, the late Moriarty's right-hand man...
Why is it so good?: A triumphant return for the great detective. Yes, there's a few flaws e.g. Watson's reaction to Holmes' return (Fainting?!) but the whole thing is a rollicking runaround with some great turns.
Quote: 'With my face over the brink, I saw (Moriarty) fall for a long way. Then he struck a rock, bounded off, and splashed into the water.'


So, there we are. My list of the top five Sherlock Holmes stories that you should read. There are, of course, many more as I have mentioned above but I heartily suggest that you pick these up first. If these, the very best of Sherlock Holmes, strike a chord with you then you may just find that the fogbound streets of Holmes' London, filled as they are with mystery, despicable cads and intrepid detectives, will stay with you forever.

Yeah, put that in your favourite clay pipe and smoke it.